The day after my husband died I picked up a single fallen leaf. It was from the Staghorn tree he'd planted. I repeated this tender process everyday until his funeral - eighteen fallen leaves later.
Then a few weeks later I heard his voice in my head "enjoy the flowers". At that point the nights were dark, the trees were bare and I was still numb and in shock. I could barely step foot in the garden, it was Manfred‘s sanctuary - the only place he felt truly calm and at peace, but the call was persuasive.
Gradually I made friends with the plants.
I included them into my grief dolls by embedding fallen petals and leaf fragments into the clay.
Over the months peonies and poppies have come and gone. It's mid-August now and hazelnuts are scattered on the lawn. The grief doll I made today has one embedded within its clay body. As I hold it in my hands Its strong robust form reminds me how safe and protected I felt in Manfred's arms.
Copyright Lu La Buzz 2023
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