Three months after losing Manfred I found myself gently pressing a small piece of clay between finger and thumb. I had no specific intention for the clay but soon a rough figure began to emerge. When I turned the figure over there appeared to be another figure on the other side. It reminded me of those rag dolls with two faces, one awake and the other asleep. Or the double headed ’topsy turvy’ dolls which combine two personalities or emotions in the one doll.
I understood the clay figure to be me and my dear departed husband - life and death entwined. What had emerged in my hands was a welcome surprise, it symbolised a continuing bond between us.
Since this first figure, I've created 17
more of these tiny 'grief dolls'. Some are vague and abstract, whilst others bear a resemblance to Manfred's physical form. Even though Manfred is dead, I continue to feel his presence. I sense his touch on my shoulder - I see us dancing effortlessly through the sky. These feelings and visions are embedded within the clay. Each grief doll is made with love and intention - each one brings an element of beauty to this harsh world of loss and devastation.
Copyright Lu La Buzz 2022
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